14. Just a quick update

Its saturday. My first weekend home in what feels like forever. Its a beautiful day already out there. The sun is up, birds are chirping, The Farmers market will be gearing up, as will the stampede. I will be here on my couch.
I suppose I have made progress this week. At least everyone else feels i have. I can get to the bathroom on my own. And I can also get my own drinks. So, I guess that's a good step. Its just not good enough for me.
Yesterday, I actually took my first bath in like a month, without a shower chair or without being assisted. I thought it would be wonderful. The water just didn't feel right on my skin. Its like I had a bath fizzy in the tub.. but I didn't. I thought shaving my legs would go great and I wouldnt look like a mangy Fox that just ran through a pricker bush, but my hands just werent steady enough. I thought I'd be able to style my hair by holding the hairdryer in one hand and a brush in the other. But that didn't go so well either. I thought when I looked in the mirror I would havd less grey hair than I actually did.
I sat at the dinner table with everyone and put on a smile and I think they actually thought I was part of the group. But I didn't feel like it. I could barely keep conversation. I had to concentrate on chewing very slowly to make sure I swallow it correctly. I could only see everything to my left,And I was nervous and hot tbe whole time.
I would like this blog post to be more inspirational and up beat....
Tomorrow is another day...