Life revisited

 It's today!! It's Today!!!!! 

 In just a few short hours I will have my very own horse again.  It has been a long 7? years without a horse of my own.. and anyone that knew my life prior to MS knows how huge that is.

I began riding horses when I was 3.  I completed all the Pony Club ranks, went to college in KY on a riding scholarship where I competed on the University of KY Equestrian Team.  I have been a Pony Club DC, Trainer, Riding Instructor, Equine Vet Tech & Anesthesia Tech, Tack shop owner...  My entire life was horses.

Until, of course, I was diagnosed with MS.  I lost my balance, lost the vision in one eye(which took away my depth perception)..  even moving around horses was difficult and uncomfortable.  At the time of my diagnosis I owned one horse, the love of my life.  She was 27 at the time.  I had her since she was 2.  When the time came for me to go to college, she came with me.  When the time came for me to get married and move to Colorado, she came with me.  When the time came for children, she gave pony rides.  We grew up together, learned together, shared our lives together.  However, about the same time my MS hit, her body gave out as well.  On January 30th 2015 I said my final goodbye to her.  There is not a day that goes by that my heart still doesn't hurt.

That was it.  Done.  My whole life with horses.

In 2019 my friend Jessica invited me to a "Horses and Wine Night" at her barn.  I reluctantly attended.  I just went to be able to groom a horse again, to be back in the barn, to fill up with the sweet smell of horses again.....  and wine of course.   However, Jess insisted I ride.  I couldn't say no but was VERY reluctant.  I asked for the slowest, tamest, most bomb-proof pony she had.  I proceeded to ride around, just at the walk.  I felt unbalanced and clumsy.  It was nothing like I had ever felt on a horse.  Before MS I felt more natural and at ease on a horse than walking on my own 2 feet.  I trotted a little and felt even worse.  I couldn't see the wall on my blind side and kept feeling like I was going to get my leg scraped off.  Jess then asks me if I cantered yet.  LOL,  NO WAY.  This was plenty.  I was actually on the back of a horse again.  I went through months of rehab just learning to write and walk again...  now I was on a horse.  If you know me... yeah, a few minutes later I was cantering around.  When I stopped Jess walked over and says "you look like you never stopped riding".  Now, I know this was a statement to boost my confidence. However, it was the best thing I had heard out of anyone's mouth in years.  Horse fever began again.

Since 2019 Ive got my hands on as many horses as possible.  My daughter Amelia has been bit by the bug.  So, we spend time together in barns and with riding lessons.  A little over a year ago I began helping my sister with her saddle fitting business.  The time in the barns has been immensely helpful, just re-learning how to navigate around.  Last year I began doing Equine Massage and Bodywork.  Just being around the horses brings back so much.  

So, a few months back, I  decided that Amelia and I needed more.  After my entire life being horses, just walking in a barn to take a lesson or to work on someone else's horse just isn't enough.  We NEEDED a horse to brush and love and spoil....  our OWN horse.  A horse we can get to know, get attached to.  A horse that is waiting in the barn for us who nickers when it sees us.  This turns out NOT to be an easy task. I search for weeks and then give up for a while and then begin again.

Well, a few weeks ago, out of the blue.  My sister contacted me with a potential horse that the owner might be willing to lease.  As it ends up...  this is not just a horse.  He is completely and absolutely amazing.  He is a dream.  He is just so kind and perceptive. When I ride him, I am completely at ease...  like the past, like nothing has changed.  I couldn't imagine feeling like this in the saddle again. 

As it turns out, we decided to keep him at my friend Jessica's barn.

Now just think about this... 3 years ago she encouraged me to get back on.  Now, TODAY, I'm bringing this amazing horse to her barn. I honestly don't know how this all came together but I'm certain it's some type of miracle.

So, if you are looking for me.  I will be at the barn, like I ALWAYS used to be...like nothing has changed!